Hmmm... I dont know about fandom, but in real life, I've noticed two things. The people who get gift attention are either supa-badass you just can't help but like them; and then there are those that clamor for attention and 'will be hurt' if they dont get a gift etc. When I was younger, these were my obligation gifts - same as with obligation hugs etc. Now you have to be supa-badass to get something from me - which is usually just a note saying that you are hella badass since I have the whole work/school/family/career thing going. If the badassness is of a high enough magnitude, they will get cookies. But having grown up hating people who are bratty and self-entitled, especially having grown up immigrant poor, I became the opposite.

I dont expect anything ever - which means I'm always surprised if I get anything. Even when some one says "Hey I want to write some fics, if you want one sign up", then I'll sign up, and even when I get it later, I am surprised.